JewishGen Discussion Group #JewishGen Re: When your newfound relatives do not respond #general

Leslie Weinberg <artsoul@...>

Just had a somewhat similar experience. I contacted a researcher who
was searching the same name, and amazingly, it turned out he was related
on the side which married into my family. Since I was searching for
offspring of my grandfather's sister and her husband, and he was related
to the husband, I thought, for sure, he would be excited, especially
since I told him I knew for a fact one child was alive after the War,
and I suspected others might have survived as well, and I was trying to
find them and/or their families. After two emails to me, he upped and
disappeared, never answering any of my follow-up emails. He was so
convinced that the whole family had perished in Europe, you would have
thought he would have jumped at the chance of working with me. I had
information he did not have and vice versa. I was devastated, since he
held the key for me on this family, because he was in possession of a
lot of records >from the town. I held the key to the possible survivors.
I did take a chance, on the urging of some of the great people on this
discussion group, to email him once more, asking why he had not
responded, and suggesting that even if he did not want to hear >from me
again, to at least just say so, to tell me not to bug him anymore. Not
a word in response. I will never understand people, as I guess you
don't, either. Leslie Weinberg wrote:

Hi Fellow Genners:

We have exhausted the topic of "what to do when your fellow genner does not
say thank you...". I have a problem - I have found distant relatives who
live in my geographical area.

I have sent them two Passover cards. I have phoned them two times and left
messages on their voicemail.

Finally I sent them a legal style letter explaining who I am, who can
vouch for me and asking them to contact me via phone, email or

It has been two months now. I feel very rejected. If this happened to
me...and I was not interested, I would send them a line saying, thanks but
no thanks.... or make up some excuse....too busy, working too hard....but
thank them for their efforts.

I have found these people after the holocaust had flung my relatives all
over the place. Has this happened to any of you?
Do you have any advice?
Viviane Kluska
Canton, Michigan

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