Marriage ceremonies in homes 19th century UK #unitedkingdom


Nettie Edwards
 

I’d like to know more about Jewish marriage ceremonies that took place in homes during the 18th and early 20th century. How was a location chosen? One of my family’s weddings took place in the home of the bride, another in the home id a person who appears to have been a family friend (currently doing research to ascertain if there was any closer relationship) Was there any protocol concerning choice of witnesses? Did the order of service the same form as in a Synagogue? 
thanks and best wishes,
Nettie Edwards,
Gloucestershire UK


Jill Whitehead
 

I have noticed a pattern in the incidence of home marriages as opposed to synagogue marriages in my family.  Home marriages seemed to occur under the following circumstances - 1) Poorer members of the family who were being funded by the more prosperous members 2) Family members who had been orphaned, and so did not have a parent to fund a synagogue marriage 3) Family members who had emigrated much later than the main part of the family, and so were not established in the areas they went to.  They also seemed to be more common in certain towns than others. Whether this was a reflection on the cost or availability of a synagogue wedding I do not know, but all my ancestors came over between 1865 and 1875 to Northern England or Scotland, when there were fewer synagogues to choose from.  As soon as they were established, the home weddings receded in favour of those in synagogues, until more secular choices in the 20th century, after WW2.

Jill Whitehead, Surrey, UK 


Dan Nussbaum
 

My parents, may they rest in peace, had a home wedding in my maternal grandparents', may they rest in peace, apartment in Brooklyn, New York in 1939, because nobody involved could afford anything else.

Daniel Nussbaum II, M.D., FAAP
Retired Developmental Pediatrician
Rochester, New York
yekkey@...
 
Tone can be misinterpreted in email. Please read my words with warmth, kindness, and good intentions.


Philip Freidenreich
 

My uncle had a Jewish wedding in our home because he was both a Kohen marrying a divorcee and because he was an atheist.

Phil Freidenreich
Yardley, PA


Adelle Gloger
 

Here's my two cents for what it's worth.
The issue of marriage ceremonies in homes did not depend on the economics /finances of the families. Many families did not "belong" / were "members" of synagogues as they might be now.  Membership as we know it today includes tickets / seats for the High Holy Days, etc. Years ago the shuls sold seats for the holidays. Membership was not a requirement.
 Let's get back to home weddings. Not only were the ceremonies conducted in homes, but the receptions / parties were also at home. Not like today where thousands of dollars are spent on parties for both weddings and bar & bat mitzvahs. Years ago people had "open house" to celebrate such events.
 
Adelle Weintraub Gloger
Cleveland, Ohio
agloger@...
 
 


David Harrison <djh_119@...>
 

For what it is worth, here is my pennyworth.  In England, Wales and Scotland the religious Marriage ceremony was normally in the home or an hotel because in those days the synagogue was not a recognised as a p lace for weddings and  also congregations did not have a legally recognised Marriage Secretary with an official book from which at specific times and frequencies copies were made and sent to the local Registrars' Office (the official place for all Births Marriages and Deaths).  Note that the birth Certificate will give the hospital as may the death Certificate and will not give a funeral site, nor that of the distribution of ashes which may be in river or on a hill-top though most Jews will still be in a Cemetery related to their set of Synagogues which maybe with groups of plots for Liberal;, Reform and Sephardi and also have a rose-bed for ashes.  In recent times using Zoom, I have attended ceremonies with an officiant in the funeral hall, another for the interment and yet another in a different country whilst one also had as part of the Eulogy a computer display of various items of art made by the deceased.  Pandemic meeting restrictions are being taken as opportunities.

David Harrison
searching
Van Rijn NETHERLANDS and UK
Herskowitz POLAND


From: main@... <main@...> on behalf of Adelle Gloger via groups.jewishgen.org <agloger=AOL.COM@...>
Sent: 04 February 2022 19:59
To: main@... <main@...>
Subject: Re: [JewishGen.org] Marriage ceremonies in homes 19th century UK #unitedkingdom
 
Here's my two cents for what it's worth.
The issue of marriage ceremonies in homes did not depend on the economics /finances of the families. Many families did not "belong" / were "members" of synagogues as they might be now.  Membership as we know it today includes tickets / seats for the High Holy Days, etc. Years ago the shuls sold seats for the holidays. Membership was not a requirement.
 Let's get back to home weddings. Not only were the ceremonies conducted in homes, but the receptions / parties were also at home. Not like today where thousands of dollars are spent on parties for both weddings and bar & bat mitzvahs. Years ago people had "open house" to celebrate such events.
 
Adelle Weintraub Gloger
Cleveland, Ohio
agloger@...
 
 


Susan Fifer
 

Further to the discussion about marriages at home/synagogue, I just found the following on a government website - apologies if others already know about this but it was news to me:

https://www.gov.uk/government/publications/marriage-registration-guidance-for-authorised-persons/marriage-registration-guidance

Changes from 4 May 2021
Marriages will no longer be registered in a paper marriage register. The details of the marriage will be captured on a marriage schedule or marriage document which will be registered on the electronic marriage register at the local register office after the ceremony.

Each party to the marriage will be able to record the details of up to 4 parents on the marriage schedule or marriage document (for example, mothers, fathers or step parents).

Marriage certificates can only be issued by the register office or General Register Office (GRO). Authorised persons, members of the clergy or secretaries for synagogues will not be able to issue marriage certificates after 4 May 2021.

--

Susan Fifer
Cambridge, England
sue.fifer@...


Yehuda Berman
 

My parents were married in Detroit  in 1931 in my mother's older brother's home (my parents were both orphans) on a Friday afternoon.  In 192_ my wife's paternal uncle was married in his father's home in Jerusalem, also on a Friday afternoon. That way the Friday night Shabbat meal was also the wedding celebration. In 1946, my first cousin also got married in her father's home. Presumably nobody had money for fancy weddings or hundreds of guests. Later on, as financial situations improved, people were married in halls, but even then, the number of guests was restricted to less than a hundred. And, of the many weddings I have attended, only two took place in synagogues.
Yehuda Berman


Jill Whitehead
 

In response to Sue Fifer, my son was married on 4th September 2021 - he had a civil wedding in a garden on a rural organic farm in the English Lake District, and the meal after was in the farm barn  The local Registrar explained there were no official wedding registers any more as it was all online now. However,  local registrars were now introducing their own paper versions (for a fee) and this was what was signed, and appeared in the wedding photographs. 

Jill Whitehead, Surrey, UK